ha ha!

http://www.woostercollective.com/Tagger-thumb.jpg

I want to memorize this dance!!

Bob Fosse was the forfounder of popin' and lockin' back in the deezey.
Check this out:

Zoobomb Downunderground

I came across this operative in Australia spreading the Zoobomb way. Here is a trascript from Johnny Payphone:

Zoobombing in Australia is called ROO BOMB!

So I put roo bars on this lil' sweetie to take down the mountain. 666 meters of vertical drop over 12k

Hood translations of the news.

Street conversion of the news.
And today in news: New York governor dude fucks $4,000 hoes and leaves an email trail.Other suitn’ties say its not that bad a crime ’cus they do it too. Dude is toe up because earlier he was mister clean and narrow and he went an upped the penalty for John’s busted purchasing tail. And he be using New Yorkers money. $80,000 damn. I could go to college and learn some knowledge wit dat. Imagine all the chron you could get. Irony sunk his battleship. Then the elections in Florida needed to be recounted again. Trifilin’! In other news the nation goes vegan after shocking video scandal shows fools twisting tails and shoving "downed" cows too weak to stand into the slaughter line. The poor vatos have to work all day killing things. Thug life por vida, S.A. Beef stock goes down as footage of blasted patties pile into the recalled dumpster. Can we get Fodd Not Bombs on the phone? Oh yeah, and military leader high in the homie squad quits because he doesn’t want beef with Iran. He couldn’t wait one more year. My cousin Jesse has to wait one more year to get out a the pen. Go git yo’self some mo’ gold chains cuz the dolla dropped like it wasn’t so hot. Lowest against that fine, sophisticated ass of the euro. Start burying some food and clippin’ your gats if yaddamean peace out.

UPDATE:
143 Million pounds of beef have been recalled. Then I saw this from Johnny Payphone:
Cow Jumping


How did we get so twisted?

Yo!Peace

I stumbled upon an art show at the Jack Hanley on 15th and Valencia while on my way to Thrasher's Skater of the Year Awards. There was supposed to be free bar at ye ol' Great American Music Hall while some dude get annointed by the golden skateboard saber and then bands would rock out and the thrash would commence. It was more mellow than that. Booze was la8ers and the leeches were exiting to exploit something else. The bands played to a pacified crowd with blunted eyes. Oh my god am I drinking Hateraid? I know there are diamonds in the rough, I am just sick of the sludge.

Anyhow, the art show beforehand absolutely got my eyes to sparkle.
It was a group show of posters questioning "What Happened To Peace?"

There were some political poster kingpins like Emek, Mear 1, and Shepard Fairey, as well as enraged designs by artists from around the world. This event was celebrating the release of Yopeace.org's release of their book YO! WHAT HAPPENED TO PEACE?




The bright colors in the flock of posters created a visual disturbance, many a poster designed to be screaming. I saw a many new takes on our depressing past and dismal future. A comical print boasted our modern day world leaders in the "evil" category sharing bongs on a couch and Osama Bin Laden casually eating chips out of a bag with his missing face printed on it. Or you have the stark oil drilling silouettes, the delicate beauty of an enlightened soul nurturing nature, and the sheer ugliness of mindlessness. Check out the prodigous list of artist who are involved in this project at YOPEACE.ORG


Talked to a nice fellow, Yem, who came up from L.A. for the show. He was full of smiles and positive affirmations. He has been around LA like a wall virus. We talked about how important it is to support your fellow artists, because the economy you are in will immediatley swell. The significance of a healthy community is imperative in our wan world state of affairs. He has a music project under the name Abraham Jones.








About Yo!Peace:
Yo! What Happened to Peace? was started in 2003 with 14 prints and an opening hosted by Cross World Connections in Tokyo as a response to the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq. Committed to highlighting the beauty of hand-crafted printmaking techniques as a method of visual protest, the show has traveled the globe continuously adding new artists and artwork. In the spring of 2007, a Yo! What Happened to Peace? book was published, featuring 144 color pages of over 200 prints from the show, a die-cut stencil cover and an introduction by Winston Smith. Currently based in Los Angeles, the show is put together by John Carr (curator), Katherine Kirby (coordinator), Ra (operations), and Caton Volk (producer).









During the opening, a few fellas were doing a live silkscreening. Spoke to Ra for a minute about the tour. They are going around, prying the hole in our consiousness just a little wider. The book has a stencil cover for immediate use. These fellas went out of their way to inspire immediate action and creativity. The amalgamation of the iconic artistist of our turmoil times is far reaching. International viewpoints on our sticky little situation. The urgency in the messages was a rewarding outlet for internal stife and sadness at injustices. Express yo'self hay hey hey hey. They are so officially members of RAD AMERICA.








I ran into Big Daddy of Cyclecide and he informed me that there will be a movie screening featuring our fine freaky friends next weekend, January 26th in Alameda. There will be a shuttle bus for each of the two showings. The bus will leave from Ritual Coffee in SF, stop by another spot in the East Bay, and go to the Alameda viewing spot. Adventure City!



Head Trip

A documentary film by John Law and Flecher Fleudujon
Showing at The Roxie New College Film Center

3117 16th Street, San Francisco, CA
Part of the Pranks Filmfestival.

New Hype Ma'am for Art Now SF

Hype Ma’am Shazaam!
This just in:
My Street Credits transferred from the Hipster's Bank of Portland to The Scenester's Bay Area Bank. I am now a proud intern at ArtNowSF. This is particularly exciting because it is the next level of what I was doing with Upper Playground, minus the folding of t-shirts. We work with Juxtapose Magazine and set up music, art, and fashion events featuring up and coming artists. We are constantly looking for submissions. Check out the myspace here.
Here is what is in store soon:
SUITE JESUS LOVES THE LADIES!
This Friday @ 111 Minna SF

Great in 08!

This has been quite the different ending to the long year.
In multiple years past I have spent my XXXma$ in some fabulous paradise city on the Mexican coastline. This year it was just West Oakland and me. No jugo fresco or tacos pescado. No Malecon with spanish clowns and native beaded power bracelets. I still feel like I'm in paradise. As I slowly twist awake I peer out the window and see the palm tree exploding in the blue sky, and my omnipotent lemon tree bursting with offspring. The air is comforting and moist, with a slight sea chill. "I'm on vacation, I'm sure of it." I lay my head between the folds of the down comforter and my pillows and drift into perfect happiness. For the next ten minutes, that is, until I hear the techno galloping of my ascending alarm, not nearly threatening enough to actually get my ass out of bed. I squeeze my phone until it allows me back in through the gates of slumber. I run through instantly. I can spend hours of good dream time in this ten minute state. This week I was immensely tardy for my duties at work because I spent each day sleeping for three hours in 600 second chunks. I should figure out a way to use the ten minute intervals to program my mind to lucid dream. Or get my butt out of bed so I can be on time for my dear, understanding job.

Around the solstice I bid farewell to my dear friend Shannon. The Great Shanzini and Agent Pulse were leaving for their sexy single world tour. We held a marvelous dinner with wheat-free chocolate cake with pomegranite sourcream frosting. It was absolutely the best cake I have ever eaten. Hands down.



The fine lady in the picture is the creator. She is Hollis, and that fateful night our roomate, Rev. Pasteurized (see also,
lil' B) married Hollis, Shannon, and myself to eachother. It was raining and we had two witnesses hold umbrellas over us. We vowed to be non-sexual life partners and always have each other's backs. We didn't make up this cultural ceremony. Many of my female friends down here in the Bay have female NSLP's. There is a whole Wifey network down here, where the lines between marriages are severely blurred.

The weeks before actual XXXma$ day were spent galloping like a young reindeer through the Christmas spirit circuit. Many a new friend out here happens to work for Burning Man, so I was invited along to the Department of Works Holiday shindig. Many people were dressed like santas, plenty of booze, some dusty, playafied bottles from the clean-up shenanigan's. This was so exciting to me. I felt like a detective, piecing together the story of this "Burning Man" phenomena. An outlaw city in uninhabitable space, filled to the brim with artists and craziness. These were the garbagemen and the problem solvers and the gate inspectors for this semipermanent autonomous zone. I am virgin to the "playa" experience, but with the successful artistic and social experiment now unavoidable, I start thinking about how the thing works. Who does what. I feel especially intrigued due to this years history making chapter involving the "bostonia tea party-esque burning of the man early" thing. That's not a light thing to bring up at a DPW party. In my excitedness towards the anarchist offering, I forgot that these were the people who had to work around the clock for 72 hours to restore something that was destined to burn. They weren't so stoked on Paul Addis and his antics. While walking to the party, I was trying to imagine what BMHQ would look like. Fuzzy walls, metal revolving zoetropes? Witchy fire pit performances or double loud techno? There weren't any crazy fire spider glow in the dark shit, just offices, festive trees and garlands, and a lot of beautiful freaks scattered among norms. It was raining and all the smokers huddled under an exhibition awning atop pallets to avoid the mud. I finally met thee mister Johnny Payphone, which was very pleasant. He is an historian that has been delving in to mutant bike culture and is now in Australia scooping things out. He hails from the Rat Patrol on Chicago and has seen the rise and fall of

A few days later I went to Cellspace for a party. I got in free because I vowed to help make cookies. Cellspace has been a model for creative space for my chronies and I when we were working to set up our own art village. Last year the founder died in a car accident and I think the space is sailing through rough waters. Anyhoo, it was really, really, really fun to spend a big ol' DJ dance party baking cookies looking over the crowd, sending wafts of delicious holiday cheer throughout the sweaty night.




On Christmas eve I found myself alone at the house and I was feelin' Hyphy.
So I decided to document it.


"HYPHY HOLIDAZE from West Oakland"







For New Years I went to Slab City. It was nice to have the solitude of the desert. I was there for threeish days, drove down on the bus. Played in an impromptu band at a stage some folks set up. Soaked in the questionable hot springs. Did whatever I wanted. Helped some stupid kid who sat in the fire while consumed by a psilocybin demon. That moment, the first few long moments of '08, I decided I need to know more about nurse style activities. Here's to the challenge of knowledge!







What a breath of fresh air.
This year shall be a good one.

A week into the bay.

Here I am a week deep in the new bay life.
I finally spent the whole day organizing every drawer and setting things up.
The vacation has ended and now I am on Craig's list looking for a good ol' job.
As per my goal of lraning how to get Hyphy (don't know? here's the link.) I picked up an energy drink in my local ghetto corner store called, "Hyphy" Grapple Flavored. That's right, Grape and Apple. I also purchased another one called " Mac Dre Hunid Racks" and I don't think I will open it. I think I need to save that one. It's all psycaldeleic and groovy.
I got a chance to see the whole bay from the top of the tallest building in Berkley. The view was the whole spectrum of the bay area. Oakland to SF to the Golden Gate to Marin and all the way down to the southern bridge. I felt like Simba looking out over the new sparkling kingdom. The tall dinosaur loading cranes at the docks, the hundreds of little white triangles having a saturday blast chasing each other around Alcatraz. "Sail Away Sail Away Sail Away!" The silver snake of vehicles, creeping throught the tall building grass. Breathtaking. When your rollerskating through, it's a bit grittier.
I took an eight wheeled spin to Berkley on monday. What an interesting place. It's filled with, a Shanzini puts it, Limosine Liberals, and college students. I am still on the search for the sick slick of pavement for an afternoon skate.
Spent last Thursday checking out some art galleries. Fixed a flat tire in twelve minutes. The geese have made it down from Portland and are flying above.
Ate an El Salvadorian burrito. Drank a few too many whiskey sours with the king fu family. Found a black jean skirt with gold and diamond bling on it. Caught a football that the neighbor kids were passing as I was riding my bike past. Those are three kids who won't be mugging me later. Gotta work on the rest of the neighbors now. The first day we got here my neighbor was worried as we were backing out the big ol' Budget truck that we would hit his Escalade with Muslim Masonic symbols all over it. He pointed to this tree in front of his house and said, "See that tree, that's for hanging white people." That kind of sucked. But according to Shanzini, that's how she finds the house, the white people hanging tree.
That's the last week in a nutshell.
More as the story develops.
Oh yeah. Shanon and I have a performance art gig!
On the 15th we will be doing two interpretive dance numbers throughout her friend, the fabulous Jack, piano set. He plays jams by Phil Collins, Journey, The Bengals etc. You get the idea. It will be alot like the time a few members of The Sprockettes secret sect, dance team elite, performed the last song for the last show of Team Dresch. We ended the set by crawling off the stage and slithering into the crowd. Along those lines. I'll tell you all about it!!

More Sprockettes videos.

Ignite What's Next Tour!!!

UPPER PLAYGROUND HOSTS "IGNITE WHAT'S NEXT" ART TOUR

Portland, OR - Upper Playground Portland is proud to host the Portland stop on the "Ignite What's Next" Art Tour, sponsored by Sparks, Upper Playground, and Juxtapoz Art & Culture Magazine. The tour will showcase three of the world's top artists from the world of contemporary art – David Choe (Los Angeles), Herbert Baglione (Sao Paolo), and Saber (Los Angeles).

Live art installations will take place at Upper Playground in the afternoon of Wednesday, September 19th. Later that evening, the trio of artists will paint again at the inner-SE music venue Rotture, accompanied by a DJ set from former Portland resident, D.J.P.

David Choe is a painter and graphic artist, who is known as much for his exaggerated vulgarity as for his aesthetic sense, and whose inspiration for his art comes from international hitchhiking expeditions. His art graces all facets of urban lifestyle, from t-shirts, to shoes, to video games and even hotel rooms. Sao Paolo-based Herbert Baglione is recognized as one of the staples of Brazil's contemporary art scene. His work has been exhibited in galleries from Barcelona to San Francisco. Saber is a longtime fixture on the Los Angeles street art scene. He's best known for completing the LA River Piece, the largest graffiti piece ever created.

D.J.P is one of the pioneers of "blending," a style that has recently become commonly known as the "mash-up". He can mix Pat Benatar's "Love Is A Battlefield" over the Pharcyde's classic "She Keeps On Passing Me By" and turn it into a Drum'n Bass blend about love lost that gets everyone on their feet, even people who think they don't like hip-hop. P's mix CDs have become underground classics, featuring in several year-end critics polls (Village Voice and Rolling Stone, among others).

Wednesday, September 19th
David Choe, Herbert Baglione, and Saber
Painting at Upper Playground
23 NW 5th Ave, Portland, Oregon
3pm
No cover

Wednesday, September 19th
David Choe, Herbert Baglione, and Saber
Painting at Rotture
along with D.J.P (DJ set)
315 SE 3rd Ave., Portland, Oregon
9pm
No cover

Mostly Accurate Schedule of Events

Friday, August 31 12ish-7pm Registration at Ash Street Saloon (225 SW Ash St) 7pm Drew's Welcoming Alleycat. Begins at Ash St. ends at the Florida Room (435 N Killingsworth St). No frills and straightforward. 10ish The infamous Strip Club Classic the Sequel put on by Sean and folks. Ride around to a bunch of strip clubs and get the naked ladies to sign your manifest. Ends at the even more infamous Union Jack (938 E Burnside St). For those who don't want to ride to strip clubs, just stay and drink at the Florida Room.

Saturday, September 1 10am Breakfast will be served at the Alpenrose Velodrome (6149 SW Shattuck Rd). Velodrome racers are encouraged and implored to show up early and take some laps being that Alpenrose is not your average track (them walls are steep brah). Helmets, drop bars, BAR END PLUGS, etc. all required. There will also be rental bikes available for $5. Tentative race events include : Miss-and-out, Scratch, Points, Kieren, with a possibility of Match Sprints Also, to make sure it is announced well in advance! There is absolutely no alcohol allowed at Alpenrose. There will be a zero tolerance approach to this as we can not afford to screw up with this one. Never fear though my friends, we have gotten a permit to have a BBQ and drink at a park located not too far away. So everyone not racing can drink over there. Please help us with this and plan on heading to Gabriel Park if you are going to be drinking! around noon (simultaneous with the track racing) BBQ and wacky antics over at Pendleton Park (5300 SW Iowa St). Did someone say beer bungie? How about grass polo? Any other bright ideas are also welcome. 8pmish (following the track racing) Foosball tourney and party at the Mill Street House. Also we will try and do track skids that night as well. 12am Beefa's "Hell of the Southeast" Criterium race down under the Burnside. I think it's 2 neutral laps with 6 race laps and a shit ton of ticki torches lighting the way. Get ready for some uphill cobblestone sprints and/or mayhem. P.S: Helmets will be required at this one as it is a rather rough course and I am also warning folks with little to no bike handling skills that they should go ahead and sit this one out. If you don't feel comfy riding in a pack of racers around sharp corners over choppy streets then don't even bother.

Sunday, September 2 (*¡C Murder's Birthday!*) 10am Tod D Danger's Hazel & C Murder's CoffeeCat. Drink coffee, ride your bike, puke, repeat. Ends at Alberta Park (NE 22nd Ave & Killingsworth St) 12ish (following the alleycat) Alberta Park. BBQing and side events with a Tag Team alleycat put on by Hazel HoZo and Joel Metz(so you better start wishing for a friend cause it takes two people to ride this race). Side events will be run of the mill kinds (stands, footdown, etc.) with some stupid ones as well (wood chip jogging path time trials, egg and spoon relays, slow race, and I'm thinking of renting a dunk tank and putting Rob Murder in there to heckle folks). 8ish Group ride to the Plan B [formerly Acme] (1305 SE 8th) for the awards show starring: Me! drunk with a microphone and a bunch of prizes.

Monday, September 3 10am SHARP West Side Polo Invite. Single elimination, winner takes all, "stop bitching and throw your own damn tourney if you don't like it" style tournament. Winning team will take home the three brand new "champeen" belts made by PUMA's resident artisan beltmaker, Dr. Doom. Be there on time for sign up (seriously). Also, there will be a $5 per team entry fee. 12ish Talk of a possible alternate event for those who don't care about polo. Though, there will be entertaining fighting at the tourney and of course BBQ and beer so that is something to consider.

Tour De fat Portland 2007

B.C.Clettes get chased by LAPD helicopters!!!

That's right, our sister bike dance team from Canada are finishing up a tour and their performance was lit up by LAPD helicopters. They said that the cops were doing their own kind of dance to herd out the terrible threat of a bike dance performance. HA HA!!!

bcclettes.ca

Sprockettes @ Toour De Fat in Seattle

Saturday AUG.4th Aquachop with CHUNK 666

They have been doing this for a couple of years now.
That's right, amphibious bicycles on a journey from Chunk station Zebra to Ross Island.
I think this year they will have a sail bike. Booyah!

Trent Call is my Hero!

Bike Trapeze

Sprockettes BADASSOSSITY Tour!!!!

Well, The Sprockettes are going on tour tomorrow and we are headed for California. We perform in San Francisco at the Tour De Fat in Golden Gate Park. Tell your friends and come say hi to us!! We will be in the bay area for a week and we are looking for bike gangs to roll with and parties to crash. Hit up our myspace if you have any hot leads.


We will be blogging our tour HERE

Sprockettes BADASSOSSITY Tour Blog

SMTP on Judge Mathis

MCBF 2007

Of all the wierd coincidences....

Check this out:
I was on tour last year and we showed up in Ft. Worth just in time to load in and play a show. We had driven for 24 hours straight in the Pink Bannana. My body was cramped back into the fetal position because of how we had to sleep in our two foot sections alloted to us. Head on the seat in front, arms around my middle, in and out of conciousness. Dreams and reality were indescernable.
So we jump out of the van, pop all of the joints and load in the equipment with grey bloodshot eyes. The show was so-so but the place we ended up staying at held a secret surprise. Feast your eyes on the most amazing coincidence in the world. Our host had the same birthmark as me in the same place. Weird wierd wierd!

Mississippi:MAY

9am Sunday Morning

Last Saturday my band had the pleasure of performing with one of my all time favorite bands, Japanther. It was at the aforementioned Mississippi:MAY art warehouse. What a neat-o setting for a rock show. Japanther set up in front of some cute little shanty's with a wheatpaste mural behind them. Some Black Label kids showed up from the bay area and brought their friends from Minneapolis and they played an opening set. I am looking for pictures to clue you in completely.
Show Me The Pink had a Beach Cruisin' Cruise on the way to the spot. People were dressed in bikinis and safety vests, krew vests and tallbikes. They filmed a video to be used for our first music video. We'll have to cut and paste me in because I was at work. If you, the reader, have any links to photos, I would love them.
dd/mm/yyyy played a rocking set, Japanther didn't play as long as I would have wanted them to. I was running around in circles that night, making sure people had stuff they needed. I had my hands deep in the organization, so by the time I was ready to play, I was sober still. Which is good, but not in this case. I screwed up so many of my parts. I forgot one of the songs that I made up completely. I just looked at this black and white pattern in front of me and was at a total loss. Holy shit. I played worse than when I first learned to play. It didn't help that every single boy I have a crush on or kissed in three states were standing in front of me with their arms crossed. I couldn't sleep that night. I had spent so much energy on making this event fly that when it came time to perform, I might as well have been a kindergartener standing in.
I couldn't sleep at all that night. I kept reliving the trauma-rama. I woke up at 9 am that sunday morning because my conscience was still throwing darts at my self esteem.

Mississippi: MAY

There is a large warehouse being transformed by a team of 30 artists and we will be opening it to the public 5/19-5/31.
Check it out:
MISSISSIPPIMAY>COM
myspace.com/mississippimay